Hello,
Looks like I missed a few things last week while I was in SCSI class.
Netscape 4.0, known as Galileo, is scheduled to come out by the end of the year with new features.
Netscape 3.0 Beta 5 should be out.
Netscape 2.02 Intl (international) is available.
Online-TV is testing. Looks like you need a 56k or better connection to check it out.
After driving for too many hours, depth perception starts to go and the highway looks like a black ribbon painted on the windshield. Ahead, Mexico City appears on the horizon.
Arriving at the American Embassy, James opens the car door and explains, "Stay here, that hippie look of yours will just jinx the deal. They're still jumpy over Oswald's visit."
Web: "OK, serpent head. We'll meet you in that cantina over there."
As Carville heads to the guard post, I can't resist a parting shot. "Al Gore in '96." James just glares back over his shoulder.
While James is negotiating our passage to Liberia, Igor and I enter a very seedy looking bar across the street and prepare to sample every beer this country can brew. Ignoring some ugly looks from the bar's existing inhabitants, we slide into a booth in the back.
Unable to get the bartender's attention quietly, Igor starts shouting, "Cerveza! Mucho grande Cerveza!" When the barkeep finally presents us with two glasses of beer, Igor grabs him by collar, drags him up off the floor and yells into his face, "Kein! Fehlt Ihnen etwas? Groesser!" and holds his hand about a meter above the glasses.
Barkeep: "Mein Name ist Hase."
Web: "Look, you're going to be more than clueless if I don't get two man-size pitchers of beer and I don't get them now. Comprender! While you're at it, bring two for Igor here and another two for a friend we're expecting."
As we begin to mellow out, James returns, downs his first pitcher, sits and complaints "Warm." Starting in on the second pitcher, we explains the plan.
"Under diplomatic cover, we'll travel to Consulado General de México en Nueva York. From New York, we'll fly into Paris and then it's on to Liberia. They can't provide airport security so when we get there any problems will be ours to deal with."
One of the native patrons, destined to lose a few more teeth, has consumed enough liquid courage to approach our table.
"Hey, gringos! Clinton is a bastard. He cost me my job. He can take his NAFTA and feed it to his whore wife."
Web: "Well, James. I don't usually see eye to eye with you on the Clintonistas but we can't let a foreign nation insult the President and First Lady. That is the private reserve of US citizens."
During my little speech, under the table, I remove a sock and insert my Zippo lighter into it forming a crud blackjack (BIC lighters are useless in a bar fight). At the same time James makes a fist around a roll of quarters. He takes these bar fights much more personally than I do.
Leaving a trail of broken teeth, bleeding heads and unconscious bodies in our wake, we head for the airport and the next leg of this savage saga.
Chapter four: "Marines meet Manhattan" or "Does this apple smell funny to you?"
Date: Thu, 20 Jun 1996 12:39:49 -0400
From: Pete <MidiPunk@cinmpc.com>
Subject: AOL SUX
Dear WebWalker,
Your page (AOL Sux Pyramid) was visited by a representative of DORX inc., and we've reached a verdict...
IT SUX!
Yours is the prestigious honor of wearing our GIF OF SUXINESS.
If you accept or wish to retort; please reply.
To: Pete <MidiPunk@cinmpc.com>
Subject: Re: AOL SUX
Dear DORX inc. ,
Thank you. I can't express in words how honored I am to receive this prestigious award. I'm dreamed since childhood of this moment -- but I must thank all the little people who made it possible. First, Steve Chase. Steve's AOL has inspired us all to SUX. My dog, Zorra (someone told me to always add some human interest to my speeches). The cockroaches in the kitchen that remind me of AOL when I turn on the light at night -- but mostly I have to thank all those damn AOL "free hours" disks that make the dog's new house possible and launched a thousand new jokes on the Internet.
So in conclusion, I must say this page will wear the GIF OF SUXINESS forever (or at least until the thought police haul my ass away) with great pride.
...wtb... - http://www.byrum.org/3stooges/
P.S.
Sorry to hear, some folks just don't have a sense of humor.
P.P.S.
Looks like you've wormed your way into this week's Web Surfers Report.
Date: 19 Jun 96 11:21:09 EDT
From: C & J Fannin <72712.1566@CompuServe.COM>
Subject: Another Good One
Greetings,
I found this gem. If you read enough Jeff Cooper, Rush Limbaugh sounds
like a flaming liberal:
http://www.neosoft.com/~mkeithr/jeff/index.html
Later,
Chuck Fannin
Thanks. Have you checked out:
Geoff Metcalf Newsletter
[ http://com.primenet.com/callme/metcalf/ ]?
From: Jim Bergsten <bergsten@arkres.com>
Subject: From down under (I think)
The company (I'm not naming names here but it has been featured in Dilbert) I'm employed by is shutting down the first week of July and forcing everyone (except engineers working on late projects) to take vacation. Since I'm having vacation thrust upon me, I figure I'll take the second week of July as well.
What does this mean to the Web Surfers Report, you may ask. Well, hopefully, little or nothing. Thanks to a couple of fellow web surfers, I am now lap top enabled. So I will try to submit reports from the field.
In the year 2000, taxes have risen to 75% for the average taxpayer. Al Gore in on the campaign trail. The campaign message: "Put your nest eggs in my branches." He doesn't like to call them stump speeches. He say it's a put down on trees. Taking advantage of the Motor Voter Bill, the environmental whackos have registered all the trees to vote. The Republicans are having trouble getting the hang this eco-election stuff. They've proposed exempting firewood from the national sales tax.
No trees were destroyed in the production of this week's URL's.
The Web Surfers Report is also available from the websurfer mailing list:
June 23, 1996 |
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