Name That War.

Hello all,

If history has taught us anything, it's you can't win a war without a catchy name. Operation Overlord and you're on your way to winning World War II. Carter's failed Iranian rescue mission? They called it Desert Dirt, total loser.

OK, so what is the media calling this tiff with a thug?

ABC, CBS, CNBC - Crisis in Kosovo
CNN - Strike on Yugoslavia
FOX - Conflict in Kosovo
NBC, MSNBC - Flashpoint Kosovo
PBS - I don't know and I'm not going to watch 2 hours of pledge breaks to find out.
Comedy Central - Kick in the Balkans

Other than Comedy Central, these couch potato(e for Dan Quale fans) warriors wouldn't know a winning name for a war if it ran over them in a dark alley with a Yugo. So it's up to us to come up with a name. I'll start it off with a few suggestions then you can send your favorites and we'll send the most popular names to the Ministry of Truth for dissemination to the unwashed masses.

But first some late breaking news:

1) NATO scores direct hit on a Yugoslavian cemetery. Search for survivors continues.
2) 80,000 refugees are missing from a camp in Macedonia. Looks like we're going to need a whole lot of pictures on a whole lot of milk cartons.
3) Serbian grafitti: Monica, clench your teeth.
4) Clinton has removed Solbo's palace from the target list because it houses a Rembrandt. If the Branch Davidians had had a Rembrandt, they might be alive today?
5) NATO plans to bomb the Serbian TV station if they don't change their programming. PBS better hope Clinton likes Masterpiece Theater or they could be in a world of hurt.

Now back our name the Pay-Per-View event of the month contest.

1) Chaos In Kosovo
2) Seizing Serbia
3) Thirty Seconds Over Belgrade
4) From NATO with love
5) Stealth means not have to say you're sorry.
6) The Refugees Crusade
7) Pissing on Pristina
8) The Blue Berets
9) Back to the Balkans
10) Kiss My Kosovo
11) Bombing For Dollars
12) Operation Low Blow
13) For a Few Bombs More
14) The Boys From Belgrade (or in this case maybe Bellview.)
15) NATO: Not just for defense anymore
16) Confused in Kosovo
17) Albright's Folly
18) WWIII: The Curtain Rises
19) Operation Chinagate
20) Mediterranean Madness
21) Storming Fortress Serbia
22) Tough Love American Style
23) Operation Save Face

During the Persian Gulf War, liberals were chanting, "No blood for oil." How come they're not chanting, "No blood for refugees" today?

Many of the Albanian leaders have been reported dead. Now they're showing up on TV. We really shouldn't be surprised. It is Easter.

It's the ground war stupid,
....wtb... - http://www.pobox.com/~the.web.walker/humor/