Bill Clinton Laid Here.

Hello all,

If you've ever traveled on the East Coast, you know that every piss-ant dump with a back room and a urine soaked mattress has a plaque out front that reads, "George Washington Slept Here."

Now it's time we gave Clinton the same presidential treatment. Since it will be easier to retire Air Force One than clean up the cum stains splattered all over the damn thing, why don't we start there. Donate it to the Clinton Presidential Library complete with plaque, "Bill Clinton Laid Here."

Then we can move on to the White House tour and put one in the Oval Office, the Lincoln Bedroom, the White House dining room, most of the hallways and half the closets. Hillary's bedroom will need a special plaque, "Bill Clinton not laid here. Never was! Never will be!"

Of course, the rest of the country will want to share this historic site bonanza. That means a plaque for Mount Rushmore and every street corner in Little Rock, Arkansas. As for San Francisco, we don't even want to know where those plaques will be posted.

From Barbara Streisand's bedroom in Los Angles to Al D'Amato's apartment in New York City, these plaques will cover the nation left coast to lefter coast.

Now, thanks to Clinton's grand tour of Red China, thousands of the plaques will be scattered across Asia.

You have to wonder what Clinton will do in March of 1999 when Red China files 500,000 paternity suits against the poor bastard in the World Court. Since the average male body, including erection, only contains 6 quarts of blood, demanding blood tests could be a dangerous defense strategy. If the president chooses to become an extremely dead-beat dad, U.S. taxpayers could be looking at better than $500,000,000 a month child support payment.

With that kind of money at stake, it's safe to say Clinton has saved the United States from communist aggression. The Red Chinese won't invade us, they'll just bleed us to death.

Good night and best of luck with Windows 98,
....wtb... - http://www.pobox.com/~the.web.walker/humor/

P.S.
Microsoft: "Windows 98 is generating only about a third as many support calls as Windows 95 did when it launched."
Not bad considering they only sold about 1/5 as many copies.