| Date Aired | Episode | Title | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Second Season | Description | ||
|
6/24/98 |
Summer Sucks |
Yeah, it sure does. Doesn't it? A giant snake threatens the United States with utter destruction but Mexican bottle rockets save the day. Jimbo and Ned fail a true or false test after three guesses. |
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6/17/98 |
City On The Edge Of Forever |
If was called "Flashback" (or "Flashbacks") then they renamed it after an old Star Trek episode. I don't why since it's just some sort of dumb ass ice cream dream where Ms. Crabtree, the bus driving fuck, finds stardom and happiness. |
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6/10/98 |
The Mexican Staring Frog Of Southern Sri Lanka |
We'll go to hell for lying (just like stealing) but it's real good for ratings. The frog is a symbol of man's struggle against the tyranny of network TV (and your girlfriend hiding your remote.) |
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6/3/98 |
Conjoined Fetus Lady |
Pip, the English fuck, wins the dodge ball World Championship for the South Park Cows. The school nurse is paraded though town like the freak she is. |
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5/20/98 |
Ike's Wee Wee |
Kyle finds out his little brother, Ike, the Canadian fuck, is a Canadian fuck. Their parents terrorize the town whacking off weenies. |
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5/27/98 |
Chickenlover |
A bookmobile driver, the chicken fucking fuck, fucks the town's chickens to teach Barbrady, the town cop fuck, how to read. Clearly a plead for help for illiterate free range chickens around the world. |
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4/22/98 |
Cartman's Mom Is Still A Dirty Slut |
Cartman finds out John Elway, the quarterback fuck for the Denver broncos, is his father. |
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4/1/98 |
Terrance & Phillip in "Not without My Anus" |
Two Canadian fucks fart there way though an April Fool's Day gag. Cheated out of their God given right to conclusion to the previous seasons cliffhanger, an angry lynch mob quickly convinced the creators of this series to reschedule the above episode. |
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| First Season | Description | ||
|
2/25/98 |
Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut |
This is the season cliffhanger. Cartman wants to know who's his father. By the end of the cartoon, every male in South Park is wondering who is his father. Hell, by the end of this thing all the viewers are demanding to know who's Cartman's father. (See above.) |
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2/18/98 |
Mecha-Streisand |
Remember Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas? When things get weird, Barbara Streisand always seems to come up. |
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2/11/98 |
Tom's Rhinoplasty |
Mr. Hat gets a nose job and fucks every women, animal, thing in South Park. Mr. Garrison has to kill him. No guest appearance by Gilligan. |
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12/17/97 |
Mr. Hankey, The Christmas Poo |
The creators of this series forget to flush the toilet and some kind of shit monster steals Christmas. |
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11/19/97 |
Starvin' Marvin |
A starving African eats Cartman or is it maybe Cartmen eats a starving African from Ethiopia. It's been a while. I forget. |
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2/4/98 |
Damien |
Satan's son shows up at South Park Elementary School. Those bastards kill Kenny. Jesus battles Satan on "pay-per-view." |
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10/29/97 |
Pink Eye |
Kenny turns everyone in South Park into "Night of the Living Dead" zombies. |
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9/17/97 |
Death |
Stan's grandfather, the ugly fuck in the wheelchair, wanted Stan to help him die. He (Stan's grandfather not the Grim Reaper) plans to get that help even if he has to kill Kenny to get it. |
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9/10/97 |
An Elephant Makes Love To A Pig |
Mad scientist tries to create Elephant bacon. Cartman, fearing he's adopted, thinks there are his parents. |
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9/3/97 |
Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride |
Stan's fag dog kills Kenny. Big Gay Al explains to Stan, "The only thing you can do with a homosexual dog is bone it." |
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8/20/97 |
Volcano |
Volcano destroys South Park. Big Foot, a weird fake documentary creature, eats the survivors. |
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8/27/97 |
Weight Gain 4000 |
Cartman turns into an even fatter fuck. Mr. Hat has sex with Kathie Lee Gifford. |
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8/13/97 |
Cartman Gets An Anal Probe |
Aliens kidnap Ike, Kyle's little fucking Canadian brother. Everything but bats fly out of Cartman's ass. |
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| No Season | Description | ||
|
1997 |
002 | Cartman Gets An Anal Probe | The pilot before the Comedy Central suits got their hands on it. |
|
1995 |
From Christmas carols to senseless violence, this video Christmas card teaches the South Park gang the meaning of Christmas but not before Jesus and Santa battle to the death (as only two true Christmas icons can) for complete domination of Christmas. | ||
| ca. 1992 | 000 | The Spirit of Christmas [Baby Jesus vs. Frosty the Snowman] | A primative version of the South Park gang create a Frankenstien moster from a snowman. After Frosty, disguised as Santa, kills Kenny, Stan and Kyle turn to Jesus for help and learn the true spirit of Christmas. -- Presents! |
July 3, 1998 |
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